Becoming better is better together. And while we certainly celebrate goals and individual achievement, this journey of family life simply doesn’t happen alone.
We view family life like a tandem bike. The ride in front feels a lot different than the ride in back, but when the riders each give it their all, they move significantly faster than a single bicyclist. And amazingly, a tandem bike can have more than 2 riders! When we work together, in tandem, as husband and wife or as parents and children, we increase our ability to change and our potential to become better.
Like riding in tandem, living in tandem is not easy. It takes intentional thought and consistent action.
It requires revolution!
“Revolution” has 2 meanings: 1.) a change, or 2.) a rotation forward. Tandem living, like tandem riding, might require a dramatic or fundamental change in the way you think about yourself or your family. And it will always require a coordinated effort to move yourself and your family forward.
A tandem revolution will change the way you engage with your children, treat your spouse, and spend your time. It will alter your focus, shift your priorities, and transform your thoughts. And in all that rotation you will find greater joy and increased purpose!
How can your family begin to change together? By deliberately returning to the basics!
Make love the heart of your home and the “why” behind all you do.
Draw your children close and hold them tight as you gently teach them all they need to know.
Find ways to simplify your to-do list and spend more time living the way you want.
Stay deliberate, but make and take time to relax and enjoy the world around you.
Make memories at mealtimes and elevate eating from task to tradition.
Welcome to The Tandem Revolution! We’re happy you’re here, and excited to have you along for the ride!
According to Lizzy
Ryan Davis. He seriously is good at everything. He is always the one to make anything happen. He is action oriented, focused, deliberate, and super talented. It only annoys me sometimes. Usually I just feel super lucky.
Ry eats a batch of air-popped popcorn every night. When he is in the mountains he smiles like a little boy. He is always planning our next vacation, and decides he’s going to move to each new place we visit. He makes sure that every moment matters, and life with him has been anything but boring.
I used to say that I wanted to marry someone similar in the ways that matter, but different in the ways that I liked, and that’s what I found. In some ways you could never find two people more opposite. Where I’m loud, gregarious, and spontaneous, Ryan is quiet, methodical and brings order to life. We balance each other out, though, and our differences have helped us each become better in so many ways.
In those things that really matter, though – faith, family, goals, and who we really want to become – we are 100% aligned. We are both super intense, stubborn, and passionate about creating a home, defending the family, and working towards the best lives we can lead. We might not always agree about the peripheries, but on the things that matter we are completely in-step.
Ryan is extremely well read, and is always looking to learn something new. Rather than read one book at a time, he has several books-in-progress spread throughout the house. Most of those books have something to do with raising kids, being a better spouse, or saving money. I learn so much by picking his brain about the books and articles that he has read recently.
Ryan is currently practicing law, and has a background as a divorce attorney. As his paralegal for 2 years before having kids, I loved watching how he worked with and helped others. Through his experience in family law, he developed a passion for what makes families work by seeing first hand why they fall apart. He realized that with a little more education, many families could be spared the pain of a broken home.
He knows, better than anyone I have met, that the best education happens at home, and he puts that into practice. He is kind, patient, loving, and prioritizes his family. He finds it difficult to tell the kids (and me for that matter) “no” to one more game, song, book, or snuggle, and we all feel that he puts us first.
Discovering truths and powerful insights about the family has been our passion since long before we met. Being married has offered experience, practice, and endless hours of conversations to determine what we believe and what can make a difference.
Ryan has a talent for discernment and is always working at being better in each area of his life. This blog – like our marriage – would only be half of the equation and the potential without his insight and vision.
According to Ryan
The 8th child of 11, and now mother of 2 rambunctious toddlers, Henry and Annie, Lizzy is no stranger to life in the fast-lane. She dedicated herself to the full-time study of marriage and family when her parents divorced after 25 years of marriage. At a young age she determined to learn all she could in order to write a different end to her story. She became obsessed with not only having a marriage that lasted, but creating a marriage that she enjoyed along the way. She has found her passion in educating others on resiliency, conflict resolution, and time management.
Our most difficult challenge of late has been grieving the loss of 4 pregnancies over the course of 1 year. Those miscarriages have been hard, and the lack of answers even harder. But they have also reinforced Lizzy’s certainty that being a mother and a wife is her greatest blessing and her deepest desire.
Ever since meeting Lizzy at a summer barbecue in the backyard of my childhood home, I knew she was something special. She plays down the fact that she’s a mathematician, a builder, a chef, and an artist. She’ll also deny any musical talent, but Henry and Annie can’t help but dance whenever Lizzy is at the piano.
Lizzy loves life, is strong-willed, and is naturally confident. She’s an extrovert, and is energized when she’s around others. She can talk about anything, from politics, to motherhood, to God. But she’s a listener too, and empathetic to a fault. People seek out Lizzy for her advice, but also to simply be heard. As a certified Love Thinks instructor, Lizzy is passionate about helping others to see the value in building strong relationships.
Lizzy is also obsessed with Christmas, which lasts longer at our house than most anyone else’s. If she could celebrate Christmas all year long, she would. But for now, we’ve compromised. Apart from a small Christmas celebration one night each month that we have with the kids, the official “Christmas season” in the Davis home begins November 1 each year.
Lizzy works hard, and she plays hard. When she plays, if it’s at anything competitive, she wins. (Unless it’s Scattergories.) When she works, she’s tenacious and determined. Without exaggeration, the best thing Lizzy has done for our marriage is to sleep train both of our children by the time they reached 12 weeks of age. To have babies that sleep soundly at night and stay in bed until 8:00 in the morning has given us the time and energy we need to be a better husband/father and wife/mother. The best part was, she trained those kids by herself, while I slept!
This blog is a reflection of Lizzy’s view on life—the more good we all do together, the better we become. It takes work and it takes patience, but Lizzy is consistent in deliberately trying to improve. She is excited to get to know you and to learn from your wisdom and experience as we all intentionally strive to be better.